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Sealiah.........Thank you for reading and commenting on the poem. You say you have joined...........are you presently in the armed forces?
Here is my take on the changes you suggested.
To see Old Glory on parade, (you capped the first word but this is a continuation of the previous line in the sentence, so it should not be capped)
its never failed to please. (This is actually the final line in the sentence referred to above. Its is a contraction of "it is", therefore it should remain only as "it".
For I bleed red, white and blue. (Again you capped the word "for" and this line is also the continuation of a sentence, so should not be capitalized.
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