alanmdouglas

Dear Niemand (nobody ?),

I will paste this poem with my offerings for change back as an answer - if you compare yours and mine side by side you will see. I will also add a * where I add, change or delete something, incl punctuation.

Your English is not bad a t all, so don’t put yourself down, there will be plenty of others too willing to do that for you !

Life's password

Still, you're sitting still, thinking.*
T*ell me what* about. A*re your hopes sinking,*
did you figure it out, life's password
seems* to me, you* own* * many answers

I'd like to talk to you about forever,*
how * your* hands * still make it matter
as* you stretch them out to help us stand.*
T*earing you down, yet* you stretch * out again

Running isn't for you anymore,
tired of keeping you're eyes on the back* door
without a fight, you let the bomb blast,*
figuring this cut fades out the last
– do not understand these last 2 lines

You ask me my* dream -* it's about* you,
my guidance, untouchable, but I* grew
a*ngry, you let them take you away
I'm not prepared to lo*se you one day

Running isn't for you anymore,
tired of keeping you're eyes on the back* door
without a fight, you let the bomb blast
figuring this cut fades out the last – ditto !

Sorry I do not understand all the poem - where I have made changes you MUST agree, or throw them out - because this has to stay your poem !

I hope Ihave helped a little - if you want to explain the bits I don’t get, I could help some more.

Love
Alan