FALLING STARS - Cinquain - Poetry in Color Forum
 


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Creative Traditional Celebrating Mother Earth? Seasonal, Traditional & Rhyming poetry posts here. (i.e. sonnet, limerick, haiku & all other poetic forms as seen in the Poetry-Defined section.)

FALLING STARS - Cinquain
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Old 12-07-2006, 04:29 AM
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FALLING STARS - Cinquain
laying
beneath moonglow
on blanket of green grass
counting falling stars, craving your
caress



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Last edited by Echoes; 12-07-2006 at 08:52 AM.
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Old 12-07-2006, 07:40 AM
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very nice cinquain

one thing, how about "craving" instead of "longing"

just a thought, but I love this, your talent caresses my soul
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Old 12-07-2006, 08:52 AM
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Hey Harry

thanks for the suggestion, read and nice comments, I will use "craving" I think it works better than "longing"



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Old 12-07-2006, 09:31 AM
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good change craving is a very good word of desire,

I like this because it was serene too me and put me in a dreamy state
for a little while reflects good writing



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Old 12-07-2006, 10:12 AM
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This is very nicely expressed! Good write!
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Old 12-07-2006, 06:21 PM
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:word_thankyou: Erik, I appreciate the read and comments


:word_thankyou: Storytime



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Old 12-07-2006, 06:23 PM
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yw lisa



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Old 12-07-2006, 06:48 PM
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Excellent, once again Echoes!!!!!

I think I will try my hand at a few later......

Painted



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Old 12-07-2006, 07:28 PM
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yeah "craving" works much better
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