Biography: Jacquii Cooke is a 32 year old Black Poet from Oak Ridge, Tennessee. As Webmistress of Poetry in Color Forum, she is devoted to the more abstract styles, especially those with a strong feminine voice that center around the topic of redemption and righting the wrongs of past transgressions.
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A stalwart knight and fair of face…for fighting he was famed
A gracious lady, waiting in the castle…had him surely tamed
Uprisings from neighboring countries… he was always called to quench
Still at home he wasn’t allowed in his own bedroom…bearing sweaty stench
He kept his castle protected…all around was fenced
Scurry thieves who chanced within…for entertainment were lynched
Early childhood taught him survival…he struck out on his own
Sometimes he had visions of a strange contraption…called a “phone”?
He provided for all his family…with the crossbow shooting quail
He dreamed of one day exploring the Far East…what an adventurous sail!
Atop the castle sailed his colors…on a decorative tome
It announced that Sir Alfric welcomed all…who near and far would roam
At times so tired he returned …it seemed his face was pale
Once he ventured far, so far…seeking his own grail
He stood strongly under... the present monarch’s reign
When he had to leave his family…this cause him so much pain!
nomadicrhymer
Kinda interesting THERESE - but yep - you cheated
The 2nd one is lovely though...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amzy
Congratz to being the first to rise to the challenge, Erik. Lindamay, great story. Nomad, I think you cheated...but it turned out pretty good. Sweaty knights. hehe.
Violence famed
Bloodlust quenched
My hunger tamed
I'm not yet lynched
Your soul's my own
See me and quail
The devil phones
And we set sail
To ever roam
Your lifeforce pale
This journey's tome
With a poison grail
Endless terror reign
Such a soothing stench
Eternity of pain
Your essence fenced
Yep - depressing as TREE notes - but really a very very nice write AMZY
Interesting the "terror reign" --- noun right? Yeah - it's somehow fitting...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Altree94
I may be a bit biased but I really liked Amzy's rise to the challenge - he never ceases to depress! LOL! Lindamay's was really terrific! I gotta agree with MsJ about yours, Erik - that last stanza was a beautiful wrap-up! Nomad - I think Amzy is referring to the fact that you used the words out of their original order, but still makes a good clear poem! (I think you meant Early childhood TAUGHT him survival?)
My attempt isn't bad, but I don't have the depth of emotion that Lindamay and Erik infuse their works with!
He Loved Not Wisely
For wooing the ladies, he was famed.
His love, a thirst that was never quenched,
but there was one almost had him tamed.
He came very close to getting lynched!
She had charm and beauty all her own.
He thought her a lovely small quail.
He'd not marry, he told her by phone
and told her when his ship would sail.
Thinking that he would be free to roam
and to live life outside the pale,
just like the knights of King Arthur's tome,
as they searched for the holy grail.
He did not know that her father's reign
and his rage could raise up such a stench.
He did not know that there was such pain
as the pain he found in being fenced.
Very nice piece of writing TREE - as usual your poetry has fantastic rhythm
Quote:
Originally Posted by nomadicrhymer
Ok - here's my Re-Do! A little more short and sweet!
Love famed
Tenderness quenched
Chivalry tamed
Emotions lynched
I claim my own
I never quail
Disconnected phone
Frustration sets sail
His eyes, they roamed
Her face was pale
Effigy on his tome
Became my grail
Peace will now reign
No cheating stench
Gone all the pain
The heart now fenced
nomadicrhymer
Short and too the point. A nice writing
Thanx YAWL for sharing! When I find my muse again - I may attempt a write as well
Donno if this works or not. In the list of words were two stanzas that did NOT rhyme in the proper place. The third stanza the words roamed and tome. In the fourth stanza stench and fenced do not rhyme. In my poem I changed the word roamed to present tense (roam). In the fourth stanza I used the words as shown on the list, although by doing so the lines do not rhyme. For what it is worth..........here is my quickie poem.
Satan's Roundup
Welcome to all the famous and the famed.
Was your lust for power ever quenched?
Tell me, were all your demons ever tamed
and do you dream about the ones you've lynched?
Think of all the Yes-men, once you did own,
who scurried 'round you like a brace of quail,
who shined your shoes and stroked you on the phone,
but, absent when your final ship set sail.
It matters not how far and wide you roam,
nor who, before you cower, white and pale,
but, truth recorded in the "Record Tome"
of how you thought 'your' cup the holy grail.
'Tis time to pay the penance of your reign.
The reign that you so quickly wrenched and stenched.
It is decided you will pay with pain,
cut from the herd, you're branded, scaled and fenced.
He was bold with a claim to fame
taking over every sense of my body till quenched
Harry started as just for fun and tamed
such a dreadful love affair I should have lynched
When I started loving Harry, I was left alone and on my own
thoughts of family and friends; I quail
crying out to hear their voices just once on the phone
instead I went to Harry, and set sail
From dusk till dawn, this affair I roamed
no reflection in my mirror, for my skin is too pale
my dirty diary seems to be my only tome
my love for Harry overflows the Holy Grail
For years, I loved Harry, and his toxic reign
I no longer smoke Heroin or crave the tumultuous stench
praying to get my family back and to forgive the pain
chose to get help instead of a plot in a cemetery unfenced
{{{{~~~***KIM***~~~}}}}
p.s.--->Harry is a street name for Heroin, and this is all fiction...btw.
Last edited by PaintedDiary; 05-01-2007 at 05:25 PM.
Reason: changed size and some words
Awesome Write, YOURSELF, PD!!!!!!
This is fantastic!
Good thing you explained about the name,
cause we have a member here named Harry! LOL!
Could have started all kinds of rumors!!!!!!
- Tree.
I really must study up on my slang
WOW KIM - that was an AWESOME write - I thought you were 1st talking about my illicit love affair LOL - Perhaps you still are
In the fourth stanza I used the words as shown on the list, although by doing so the lines do not rhyme. For what it is worth..........here is my quickie poem.
Satan's Roundup
Welcome to all the famous and the famed.
Was your lust for power ever quenched?
Tell me, were all your demons ever tamed
and do you dream about the ones you've lynched?
Think of all the Yes-men, once you did own,
who scurried 'round you like a brace of quail,
who shined your shoes and stroked you on the phone,
but, absent when your final ship set sail.
It matters not how far and wide you roam,
nor who, before you cower, white and pale,
but, truth recorded in the "Record Tome"
of how you thought 'your' cup the holy grail.
'Tis time to pay the penance of your reign.
The reign that you so quickly wrenched and stenched.
It is decided you will pay with pain,
cut from the herd, you're branded, scaled and fenced.
Sartor
Quite nice SARTOR - for a quickie --- The poem has a bit of deepness within... Scary actually - but as the horror-initiated I suppose I can appreciate the madness of your lines AND "stench" and "fenced" sort of rhyme - Gosh - Perfectionist = Thanx for the sharing - nice write.
I really must study up on my slang
WOW KIM - that was an AWESOME write - I thought you were 1st talking about my illicit love affair LOL - Perhaps you still are
Jacquii.
Thank you Ms Jacquii, and........you are so bad! LOLOOLOL