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The Critique Saloon This is the place to post poems that you'd like to better by getting suggestions & constructive criticism. **NOTE** For formal critique only!

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Old 09-08-2007, 06:38 AM
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Unsheathed
Coaxed from its vile sheath
To appease the voices from beneath
an instrument of unruly malice
A weapon as wise as it is callous
No fool shall get past it
Only those with wit
Only Those who are wise
Who Learn not by their eyes
Only they stand a chance
They who hold their stance
Do not flinch do not waver
Unless its death you savor
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Old 09-08-2007, 08:02 PM
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ahhhh very interesting..... unsheathed is your poisoned pen... which does not suffer fools lightly. What is the weapon? if I may be so bold as to ask?

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Old 09-08-2007, 11:28 PM
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well it really is whatever you want it to be, but in my mind it was a sword. I was drawing inspiration from the myths of excalibir and the other great medieval swords of great power, so powerful they were characters in themselves not just things, thats what was what I was channeling.
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Old 09-09-2007, 01:38 AM
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Very creative post! I, too am in love with Excalibur stories...and King Arthur...wish it was a true story, but the more noble ones never are...like Robin Hood! lol!

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