~Serenity~

Kind of another "So Many Questions, So Little Courage" except to my mom this time. Also, not as well written

Smiles!,
~Serenity~

A Strangers Hate
Who are you now, mother,
How did you get this way?
Yesterday's love is gone forever,
Day by day we slip away.
Oftener now, it seems,
You scream and shout
Only thing for me to do -
Unleash my pain, cry and pout.
Hate and anger seem to rule,
And rarely do you apologize.
Three words could heal, and yet...
Enimosity is in your eyes.
Mother you will regret
Every hurtful, judging word you said
Someday, when you can't find me,
Only teary shadows fill your head.

Amzy

Such raw anger. The expression is good, but I think the structure needs work. I wonder if you worked harder at making the acrostic than in analysing your content. You've hinted at a past, poignantly stated the present, and predictied a future. There should be a balance of past and future, either by describing the love you miss, or by downplaying your vow of vengeance. Enimosity? Are you trying to create a new word by joinin Enmity and Animosity? For this poem, enmity seems appropriate because it is what you perceive.

PaintedDiary

Dear Ms Serenity,

Wow! This is obviously a very poignant written expression of your deep feelings. Very real, and reads as if fresh, or "for lack of better words", seems you have been hurt recently. The read also softly indicates that this has been a part of your life as well. I will not delve into the "behind the words", as I do not know about the relationship that your stanzas are based upon. Sad to think that now you or her is a stranger. What I will say is that, I felt the need to give you a big ol' hug!!! Thank you for sharing.

Painted