Emotional RomanticIn love or have poetry that tugs at ones heartstrings? Please share your romantic tear-jerkers & emotionally draining pieces right here in this forum. Composed using six cinquains - can you find them?
Wanted Again!
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Biography: I published my first work at the age of 23, "People Poetry", since then 10 or so publications
Jer4clarity has not championed any arcade games.
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Wanted Again!
Wanted Again
Scout eyes…
clues of moist skin,
Essence purely engaged
Within indescribable mirth,
Plush touch,
A kiss.
Secret
Stolen moments
Unbridled fantasies,
both spirits intoxicated
for once.
Delicacies.
Banquet
Set unguarded
By convention’s taunt gaze
Or appropriate behaviors.
Enjoyed.
Not traded or bartered.
Willing
Window’s of souls
Mesh like fine woven cloth.
Trade fleeting infatuations,
Wholly.
Escape consent and soon take flight
Confess.
It’s not the time
To embrace desertion
Of melancholy commitments
To sin,
Again.
Last edited by PaintedDiary; 06-17-2007 at 07:16 PM.
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Biography: Teachers, like candles; consume a little of ourselves everyday, so our students can shine bright.
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PaintedDiary has not championed any arcade games.
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Dear Jerry,
Where does one begin? To quote a favorite cinquain would be quoting the poem in its entirety. This is an exquisite woven tapestry of unspokens, fantasies, and stolen moments. The structure and layering are brilliant. The "Lines in between" introductions are amazing, carefully chosen, and placed precisely. The "pause" if you will, allows the reader to absorb your words and prepares the reader for the next beautiful cinquain. Simply stunning! Loved it!
An excellent rating!
{{{***~~~KIM~~~***}}}
Last edited by PaintedDiary; 06-17-2007 at 03:02 PM.
Reason: additional commentary
Biography: I published my first work at the age of 23, "People Poetry", since then 10 or so publications
Jer4clarity has not championed any arcade games.
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Bear thanks for reviewing and sharing your thoughts.
Kim - Your comments were greatly appreciated and touching. Thanks for the excellent rating. The lines in between are a cinquain by their self and form a second conclusion to the poem.
A kiss.
Delicacies.
Not traded or bartered.
Escape consent and soon take flight,
Again.
hence the sixth cinquain!
The question now is which path does the writer or reader take?
Life will takes it course, regardless, and only the watcher knows.
These are quite fun and challenging to write. Try one!
Biography: Teachers, like candles; consume a little of ourselves everyday, so our students can shine bright.
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PaintedDiary has not championed any arcade games.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jer4clarity
The lines in between are a cinquain by their self and form a second conclusion to the poem.
A kiss.
Delicacies.
Not traded or bartered.
Escape consent and soon take flight,
Again.
hence the sixth cinquain!
The question now is which path does the writer or reader take?
Life will takes it course, regardless, and only the watcher knows.
These are quite fun and challenging to write. Try one!
Blessings!
Jerry
Dear Jerry,
I did not see that at first. I love when we twist, manipulate, and play with our craft in poetry. We can do so many exciting things with the forms if we are willing, if we get creative and etc.
You stated that , Life will takes it course, regardless, and only the watcher knows, and I could not agree with you more!
This was a brilliant take on the Cinquain Jerry, and I loved it!
I may have to try a few of this kind of Cinquain, that you have created here.
Your contribution looks effortless and is quite exquisite. May take me a while, but I promise to try and deliver.
AWESOME!!!!!
{{{~~~***KIM***~~~}}}
Last edited by PaintedDiary; 06-17-2007 at 06:30 PM.
Reason: additional commentary and color
Jerry.........well written as usual. The cinquains with title lines configured into the presentation that make up a sixth cinquain is original thinking on your part. I believe the reader would not notice the sixth cinquain, unless it were predefined in the introduction.
Great job, you have my congratulations
Sartor
P.S. On reading through your verses I did come across one simple error.
Banquet
Set unguarded
By convention’s gaze
Or appropriate behaviors.
Enjoyed.
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Wanted Again!
I love when we twist, manipulate, and play with our craft in poetry. We can do so many exciting things with the forms if we are willing, if we get creative and etc. 