Creative Traditional:Celebrating Mother Earth? Seasonal, Traditional & Rhyming poetry posts here. (i.e. sonnet, limerick, haiku & all other poetic forms as seen in the Types of Poetry section.)
The voice within resounds again
Seeks to tell what’s worth telling
Into the vortex I will spin
Tell tales of seas I was sailing
~
Seeks to tell what’s worth telling
The right from wrong I’m not saying
Tell tales of seas I was sailing
Truth be told we were just playing
~
The right from wrong I’m not saying
The bars I entered were just cages
Truth be told we were just playing
Say all the wise men and the sages
~
The bars I entered were just cages
Into the vortex I will spin
Say all the wise men and the sages
The voice within resounds again
~
Mjcarson
8-29-2007
Hi Kit, spinning in a vortex comes across with this form, (that I can't name right now). You did a good job getting your thought over with such restrictions.
I love this style...the repetition make the words resound in your head, lending them huge importance and the flow of this poem is perfection.
Nomad
Excellenceis the result of caring more than others think is wise, risking more than others think is safe, dreaming more than others think is practical, and expecting more than others think is possible."
I think I am spinning in a sea of conflicting tides. Terence is right. This really does have the feel of entering a vortex.
Jolie
"You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing which you think you cannot do." (Eleanor Roosevelt)
Wonderful Write I recognize the form but do not recall what it is named. Would you be so kind as to enlighten us Dear Kit?
One thought .....
The Following Text Is Quoted:
Tell tales of seas I was sailing
I was wondering if .... instead of Tell tales.... what about Tall tales? Just a thought you can use or lose hon. Enjoyed this nonetheless..... Thank you for a Wonderful read Gave it 5 stars
Hey MIKE - I can't recall what form it is either - but it reads so smoothly and effortlessly which no doubt was difficult to accomplish with so many repetitive lines - I like the form very much - it reads like an old Irish jig of sorts - especially considering the theme of sea.
A very nice and intricately woven piece of poetry!
Thanx for the sharing
Jacquii.
“I do use powerful words to evoke emotion, but also to stimulate imagination. If one can 'see' the words dance before
his eyes - then he can likely feel, smell and even taste them as well. And I do thoroughly enjoy really tasty poems.
My poetry is an emotions-fest sprinkled with a little garlic salt, Mrs. Dash, fresh ginger and Tabasco sauce...
My poetry is like a piece of General Tso's chicken tossed in ghetto soul.” ---MsJacquiiC
Thought I recognize the form - It's PANTOUM right?
Perhaps there is publishing yet to come for you: Poetry-Defined.com
Jacquii.
“I do use powerful words to evoke emotion, but also to stimulate imagination. If one can 'see' the words dance before
his eyes - then he can likely feel, smell and even taste them as well. And I do thoroughly enjoy really tasty poems.
My poetry is an emotions-fest sprinkled with a little garlic salt, Mrs. Dash, fresh ginger and Tabasco sauce...
My poetry is like a piece of General Tso's chicken tossed in ghetto soul.” ---MsJacquiiC
Thanks everyone and yes it is a pantoum and I am already entered in there, but I written 12 of these now and absolutely love them, but they are hard to do. Thanks for the lovely comments all and suggestions, but I think "tell" is better than "tall" because these are real tellings and I wouldn't want anyone to think that they weren't.
I actually agree with you MIKE LOL - someone once told me I am a "teller of tall tales" ---- NEVER did quite understand that one and still scoff at it whenever I get the chance LOL - I think "tell" is the better word as well AND yes - I did do a little reading in the Types of Poetry section - but I 1st read in the Calls section - don't know if you submitted the same poem - but I thought the form is a familiar one! I've yet to write my own pantoum - but the way you've written shows me the beauty that the form is all about! Again = Thanx for the share
Jacquii.
“I do use powerful words to evoke emotion, but also to stimulate imagination. If one can 'see' the words dance before
his eyes - then he can likely feel, smell and even taste them as well. And I do thoroughly enjoy really tasty poems.
My poetry is an emotions-fest sprinkled with a little garlic salt, Mrs. Dash, fresh ginger and Tabasco sauce...
My poetry is like a piece of General Tso's chicken tossed in ghetto soul.” ---MsJacquiiC
Into The Vortex
Re: Into The Vortex
I recognize the form but do not recall what it is named. Would you be so kind as to enlighten us Dear Kit?
- but it reads so smoothly and effortlessly which no doubt was difficult to accomplish with so many repetitive lines - I like the form very much - it reads like an old Irish jig of sorts - especially considering the theme of sea.
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