Emotional Romantic:

[Jer4clarity]

Wanted Again


Scout eyes…
clues of moist skin,
Essence purely engaged
Within indescribable mirth,
Plush touch,

A kiss.

Secret
Stolen moments
Unbridled fantasies,
both spirits intoxicated
for once.

Delicacies.

Banquet
Set unguarded
By convention’s taunt gaze
Or appropriate behaviors.
Enjoyed.

Not traded or bartered.

Willing
Window’s of souls
Mesh like fine woven cloth.
Trade fleeting infatuations,
Wholly.


Escape consent and soon take flight

Confess.
It’s not the time
To embrace desertion
Of melancholy commitments
To sin,

Again.

[Bear]

simply elegant beauty written with your emotional spirit
handshakes
Bear

[PaintedDiary]

Dear Jerry,

Where does one begin? To quote a favorite cinquain would be quoting the poem in its entirety. This is an exquisite woven tapestry of unspokens, fantasies, and stolen moments. The structure and layering are brilliant. The "Lines in between" introductions are amazing, carefully chosen, and placed precisely. The "pause" if you will, allows the reader to absorb your words and prepares the reader for the next beautiful cinquain. Simply stunning! Loved it!
An excellent rating!

{{{***~~~KIM~~~***}}}

[Jer4clarity]

Bear thanks for reviewing and sharing your thoughts.

Kim - Your comments were greatly appreciated and touching. Thanks for the excellent rating. The lines in between are a cinquain by their self and form a second conclusion to the poem.

A kiss.
Delicacies.
Not traded or bartered.
Escape consent and soon take flight,
Again.

hence the sixth cinquain!

The question now is which path does the writer or reader take?

Life will takes it course, regardless, and only the watcher knows.

These are quite fun and challenging to write. Try one!

Blessings!

Jerry

[PaintedDiary]

Hey Jerry, you may want to take a gander at Sartor's thread...http://jpicforum.info/creative-tradi...yone-2082.html

yes, they are fun!!!!

Kim

[PaintedDiary]

The Following Text Is Quoted:

Originally Posted by Jer4clarity

The lines in between are a cinquain by their self and form a second conclusion to the poem.

A kiss.
Delicacies.
Not traded or bartered.
Escape consent and soon take flight,
Again.

hence the sixth cinquain!

The question now is which path does the writer or reader take?

Life will takes it course, regardless, and only the watcher knows.

These are quite fun and challenging to write. Try one!

Blessings!

Jerry

Dear Jerry,

I did not see that at first. I love when we twist, manipulate, and play with our craft in poetry. We can do so many exciting things with the forms if we are willing, if we get creative and etc.

You stated that , Life will takes it course, regardless, and only the watcher knows, and I could not agree with you more!

This was a brilliant take on the Cinquain Jerry, and I loved it!

I may have to try a few of this kind of Cinquain, that you have created here.
Your contribution looks effortless and is quite exquisite. May take me a while, but I promise to try and deliver.

AWESOME!!!!!


{{{~~~***KIM***~~~}}}

[Sartor]

Jerry.........well written as usual. The cinquains with title lines configured into the presentation that make up a sixth cinquain is original thinking on your part. I believe the reader would not notice the sixth cinquain, unless it were predefined in the introduction.

Great job, you have my congratulations

Sartor

P.S. On reading through your verses I did come across one simple error.

Banquet
Set unguarded
By convention’s gaze
Or appropriate behaviors.
Enjoyed.


The 3rd line should be six syllables in length.

[Jer4clarity]

Sartor,

Dang How did I miss that one. I had taunt in there must have deleted somehow. dang.

Was really wanting you to stop by and comment thanks so much appreciate your time.

Jerry

[Sartor]

Jerry...........or you could simply say...........By a convention’s gaze

[Jer4clarity]

Sartor,

Really packs another slant your way. Interesting. That's what I like about words. My intention here was the principle being skirted. Thanks for the suggestion!

Jerry