Miscellaneous:

[PaintedDiary]

The Choice

As I acquiesce my fate
Failure lays across my plate
Lost inside my soul, my mind
Answers that I hope to find

Although I have always strived
Bad luck has ever thrived
The questions that seem to follow
Are a bitter pill to swallow

Are my prisms not aligned
reflecting a new day's sunshine?
Intrinsically I top mountains,
yet some days I am left doubting.

Drawn and quartered on the rack,
Thoughts of light now turning black
The ship I sail carefully tack
Through this course, no turning back

A gulf so deep and wide with nowhere left to hide
What do I have buried here inside?
Still I wonder if I should dare
Dig it up for you to share

You journey through the depths of my mind
Excavating the tremble and fear inside
Boldly, I share treasures deliberately untold
From my abyss the shocking truth unfolds

My soliloquy, I sing out loud
From behind the mask that does shroud
The real me hidden in grey matter
On deaf ears, my idle chatter

So if I empty out my soul
And give it all as is my goal
How do I know that you will care
And journey with me from here to there

When my ship docks and your eyes are a sea of tears,
then I shall sing forever; behold my burdens as souvenirs.
My message in a bottle did answer, to see me now
but a skeleton, as I lived each day, fervently learning how.



A Simoneaux / Carson / Robinson Production

[KayaOtah]

Amazing rhymes,
what's soliloquy??
Can't seem to find in my dictionary

[Kit Carson]

the act of speaking while alone, especially when used as a theatrical device that allows a character's thoughts and ideas to be conveyed to the audience
~
Sure looks good. You know what else looks good? Try that new link in my signature.

[nomadicrhymer]

This is extremely well-written...seamless in fact...I can't tell where one starts and the other stops...though I feel mentions of ships must be the Kit factor? I must say that the collaboration itself gives one a lot to think about and ponder upon...it is extremely tough to pick out favorite stanzas, which is always a good sign...

I felt these two really portrayed the gist of the poem, however;

My soliloquy, I sing out loud
From behind the mask that does shroud
The real me hidden in grey matter
On deaf ears, my idle chatter

So if I empty out my soul
And give it all as is my goal
How do I know that you will care
And journey with me from here to there

The ever-ongoing human cry...in need of unburdening one's soul...laying ourselves out to be dissected...appreciated...loved...and always questioning others as to the extent of their love, their motives...what is it, I wonder, that makes the human mind never satisfied with what they are receiving, like a never-ending well - waiting to be filled, but no one can tell how deep it is.

Loved the collab...awesome!!

Nomad

[zaac]

I like this. would like to know what your motivation for it was.

zaac

[inspir888]

Wow, really beautiful poem.

[PaintedDiary]

Dear Cindy,

Thank you for taking time to read and comment. Twas really nice working with two fantabulous poets on this piece. I am so glad you enjoyed it. Thank you again.

Kimberly

[MsJacquiiC]

Don't know how I missed this trio-collab - very nice really - how the poem starts out and segues into different thoughts - works on the psyche, daring the reader to ponder.........life - its very essense and our part in this essense of life. Quite a collab - I like the 1st and last stanzas - the "As I acquiesce my fate..." leads the reader to think some sort of giving in - as if trusting blindly the WAY of the world; that destiny will win out.

Loving the very last stanza - as if seeing for the 1st time the only message one need see and grasping the message in a gesture of open acceptance... Better to have dared love and lost then have never cared at all...

The Following Text Is Quoted:

When my ship docks and your eyes are a sea of tears,
then I shall sing forever; behold my burdens as souvenirs.
My message in a bottle did answer, to see me now
but a skeleton, as I lived each day, fervently learning how.

A very intriguing collaboration YAWL - a dark piece of poetry no doubt... I too (like ZAAC) wonder what inspired this write. At anyrate - thanx for the sharing - there's much in this piece for one to consider and ponder, for fate when intertwined with the truth of destiny is a many-splendored thing to behold indeed.

Jacquii.

ps - equally interesting title. I do wonder though - what's the choice?

[Kit Carson]

Okay, I will chime in and hope that Kim will add her thoughts and I wish Scott would come back and add his thoughts to this process. This was primarily an experiment in discovering what is possible. We each wrote stanzas as in the tag poetry game and in the beginning had no clue of the direction it would take, but we let Scott steer this one and we just stayed the course and it became a tale of the whole process of artistic creation and the sharing of one's hopes and dreams and failures and the choices we make when we do so.

[PaintedDiary]

Yes absolutely...as Kit beautifully has said, this piece literally flowed as it went along and we vybed off of Scott, and I was lead from both gentleman. Twas a different feel and I loved how the unknown became the catalyst for this piece. Thank you all for reading and commenting! Take Care.

Kimberly