Miscellaneous:

[jakeminick]

Soft triangles blossom
Through the smooth waters swaying,
So lissom.
Treading deftly
On the spindly webs
Of malleability.
Flouting entanglement
In this elastic enchantment.
A ballet of viscous ambiance
Caressing breaths in crystalline rhythm,
As the youngest vision seeds
The excruciating beauty
Of birth and decomposition.

[butchiesmom]

Would this a spiderweb hanging over running water hanging by a thread to water lillies? <-- Please forgive the pun, I couldn't resist, lol.

Your use of images is excellent. I can see the spider moving cautiously yet confidently over the web.
Treading deftly
On the spindly webs
I normally would have so much more to say about a poem like this but I don't think I can do better than this-->Great imagery, obvious well thought out with the word placement deliberate.

Great job!
Gail

[MsJacquiiC]

The Following Text Is Quoted:

Originally Posted by jakeminick

So lissom.
Treading deftly
On the spindly webs
Of malleability.

Wow - Yet another nice work from you Jake. I love the dexterity you show with your language. That passage I quoted above...so beautifully scribed. You just want to say it aloud because of it''s simple brillance. "spindly webs of malleability." I suppose when you "see" something of that sort - it has to be a moment of clarity LOL - not necessarily a wonderful feeling persee, but more a wonderous feeling of having been let in on a secret ha!

The Following Text Is Quoted:

Originally Posted by jakeminick

A ballet of viscous ambiance
Caressing breaths in crystalline rhythm,
As the youngest vision seeds
The excruciating beauty
Of birth and decomposition.

Never have I considered the process of decomposition anything of beauty. But it's intriguing the way you laid those lines down, I suppose if one is to admire the concept of life, then equally.... Meh. Nevermind that thought.

Interesting read though = thanks for the share

Jacquii.

[jakeminick]

thank you both for your comments on this. it was an abstract depiction of my perception at the time and knowing that this lucidity of consciousness would pass just as the ill passes.