Miscellaneous:

[Sealiah]

They say I’m a demon
I’d have to agree.
The soul becomes shadowed
In those such as me.

So cold and so cruel
We’ve lost our kind touch –
Emotion’s unneeded
Contemptible crutch…

Why then do I mourn
For the loss of my Soul
To this unending darkness -
So empty so cold?

Is it for that bright Sun?
For the bluest of skies?
Or perhaps for the friends
That to me lost their lives?

Is it for the bright pain
That only humans can feel?
Or for the heart breaking love
That only the devil can steal?

[Amzy]

Again Seliah, a gripping write. A little unusual in the second stanza, where your character speaks as part of a group (We've lost our kind touch) instead of the overall personal feel of the poem. This break in consistance stands out. Even the 'Those such as me' line prior does not set up the character to speak for the group.

I like your style, I like how you can pull me into the Vampire's thoughts. Keep it up.

[Sealiah]

You find out about pieces of that group during hte next part. The next part is a trilogy, called Vampire's Mark. I'm slowly easing into these forums. I don't wanna overload them. XD

[Altree94]

Great stuff, Sealiah! Glad to know that this is part of a trilogy because this one left me wanting more! I think the we/I issue works here because it shows that this particular vampire is different from the others and brings out the fact that there ARE others. Good job!

[alanmdouglas]

Dear Sealiah,

You bring up very well that even in the worst characters, there is SOME elementof decency hidden, even if way down. I'll need to find pt I nad await pt III.

Love
Alan