MiscellaneousHave a poetic style of your own? Have poems that defies all conventional categories? Share them here please. (i.e. dark & bitter, political, revolutionary, abstract, etcetera...) Abstract
Dream Catcher
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Biography: Teachers, like candles; consume a little of ourselves everyday, so our students can shine bright.
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Originally Posted by The Cannibalistic Woman
Mmm it gives me that feeling like I'm floating on clouds I'm not as big of a fan of abstract, but this one is a beautiful exception.
I could really go for some rainbow lemonade right about now too
Thank you so much for reading and commenting! It means allot to me! I kinda felt that way writing it to! lol....the secret is in the lemonade...
Kim
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Biography: Teachers, like candles; consume a little of ourselves everyday, so our students can shine bright.
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Originally Posted by butchiesmom
Wow, Kim! I remember reading this now but it must've been in one of my cloudy moments. I won't try commenting on anything until my mind is clear enough to see what's there.
It's like stepping out into our sunset and then stepping into a child's cotton candy dream. Rainbow lemonade? I'm all over that, lol.
Sunbeams dancing? Wow! I read this several times and picked out something different each time!
I love to read your work for this reason. You are brilliant with the poetic phrase. The images are vivid!
MsJacquii, adding color to the already colorful words were brilliant. Between the both of you....great job!
hugs,
Gail
Hey Gail,
Thank you so much for reading and commenting! I was feeling oh so rusty and this is the first poem I wrote in a while and your review sends inspiration chills! so much! Yes...a child's cotton candy dream...I love it!
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Hello Kim!
This seems like a new form for you but I really do like it and especially the imagery that you have going on with this. Since this is a shorter poem I thought that I'd go through each of the lines and what I enjoyed about the first of your lines to the end of your stanza.
Walking out of the world on the edge of born twilight-
I loved the beginning of this, a great start to your poem and brought me right in. I especially liked the imagery with "the edge of born twilight."
creating florescent symbols against tangerine clouds-
From the florescent symbols (which I am wondering what do these symbols look like? What kind of symbols? Like numbers, or words, or just kind of pictures against these clouds?) to the tangerine clouds. I especially liked imagining the tangerine clouds too.
sipping rainbow lemonade -
Ohhh, rainbow lemonade, now that just sounds delicious right there!
sunbeams dance sinful and desirous amongst the mist-
And this is just a sensual line right here... I love the line "sunbeams dance sinful and desirous amongst the mist." This has to be my fav. line in your poem, I just really enjoy your word choice and the sensuality to this line.
stardust dreams serenade a cherry moon. -
And this is my other big fav. line of yours, and a great finish to your poem. The two last lines of your poem are definitely my favorites and I like how you have the stardust dreams serenade a cherry moon, and the image of the cherry move is a pretty one like the tangerine clouds.
Anywho, I really did enjoy this poem of yours, Kim! I know that is definitely something much different than you've done and I've read of yours but I think you did a great job. Keep on writing away!
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this is beautiful. it makes me want to BE in the world your createing. the imagery is fabulous, your word choices createing this vibrant, active, colorful enviorment. thank you for this poem
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Originally Posted by seajay
wow, i like it!
short but extremely sweet.
the use of the colors and tastes and textures really makes it almost tangible.
nice work.
- cj.
Dear seajay,
Yes! Thank you sooooo much for reading and commenting. I am most grateful. That is exactly the affect I was going for...I love your comment....almost tangible! Thank you again.
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Originally Posted by Anonymous Encounter
this is beautiful. it makes me want to BE in the world your createing. the imagery is fabulous, your word choices createing this vibrant, active, colorful enviorment. thank you for this poem
Dear Thea,
Thank you soooo much for reading and commenting. I am most grateful. Ya know...I was a tad bit sad early this morning and then I read your comment and it made my entire morning! I have been feeling very rusty in my writing and artwork. However, your comment supercharged me and just reading how you would want to be in the world I was creating was beautiful in itself. Thank you for more than just commenting on my poem Thea. Peace and Blessings.
I'm not as big of a fan of abstract, but this one is a beautiful exception.
lemonade...
so much! Yes...a child's cotton candy dream...I love it!
