butchiesmom

Cool air forced through vents,
Cold air radiates in a small box,
Warm air circulated by a ceiling fan,
Silence surrounds me.

Gray box with a silver screen,
Silver box radiating time’s passage,
Narrow box waits for a command,
They listen to my silence.

Bird song from the porch’s railing,
Leaves rustle as the wind flies by,
Insect wings drone outside the screen,
A tear drops down in silence.

PaintedDiary

Hey Sis,

Ya know when I read this, my mind envisioned this like an old picture show...classic, bold, and full of emotion. I saw pictures describing the first three lines to each stanza where everyone reads it silently..awesome, lastly, I saw a frame with the last line of each stanza written out..then one last picture frame with all three of the last lines together as if a poem itself! I hope all that made sense...lol...because I saw it as clear as day. Yes....the things we do hear when in silence is phenomenal. Thanks for sharing Gail!

Kim

butchiesmom

Thanks Sis! I was feeling down and lonely and could hear the air conditioner, the fan in the freezer and the ceiling fan going. The TV, stereo, and dvd player's off and waiting for me to turn them on. I could see the birds outside, leaves swaying in the trees and knew insects (darned wasps anyway) were waiting for me to open the door. All this was going on, yet all I could hear was the silence. A tear fell to my clothing and I could hear it hit the fabric. I wrote the poem.

When I sat down on the recliner, Chopper (our cat), jumped up on my lap and demanded attention. He rubbed his face against mine, got fur up my nose and jumped when I snorted, lol. Actually made me smile, the first of the day and that helped.

But isn't it amazing what you don't hear when loneliness overtakes you?

Thanks for seeing everything I put in this, Sis!

hugs,
Gail

SarahNSH

Hello Gail!

Wow, I really do like this poem of yours! And, this may be my favorite poem of yours that I've read so far. And I think that this is very insightful too, what would lonliness sound like if it had a sound to it? I agree with you, lonliness would definitely sound like silence, a neverending kind of silence where your like stuck in a box with it and all of the noises of the world can't get through. The poem reads to me as a sort of snapshot with each line. It's a sort of "SNAP" and the image of the line just jumps to one to the other but having a nice flow to it as well. I really like how every last line of each stanza ends with silence. This conveys to me that no matter what noises that you hear the silence is absolute. Like with Kim I could see things very clearly as well with reading your poem. This is just a beautiful read, Gail, I'm impressed! It's short but it has such a hard punch to it and it really had me thinking as well. Anywho, thank you for sharing and keep on writing away!

My favorite stanza is the last one, though I enjoyed them all:

Bird song from the porch’s railing,
Leaves rustle as the wind flies by,
Insect’s wings drone outside the screen,
A tear drops down in silence.

butchiesmom

Thanks, Sarah! Seems I write my best poetry when sad or maudlin, lol. I could hear each of these things, see each thing and watch the world pass by as I sat here. The air conditioner's running, the fan for the freezer makes a noise when it shuts off and the ceiling fan has a sound of its own.

When I'm this down, the TV and stereo stays off. They were sitting beside me, my computer amoire's next to the entertainment center, waiting for me to want entertained.

The door was closed but I knew the birds were perched on the porch railing (I think they're teasing my indoor only cat), I could see the tree outside my window and across the narrow valley swaying with the wind and knew the insects were waiting for the door to open.

I had all this to captivate and entertain me, yet here I was, so lonely. Sometimes, I so hate being alone during the day. Blasted cat knows English, I'm sure of it, yet he won't talk to me. Aloof little so and so.

Thanks for the comment, Sarah. I appreciate it.

hugs,
Gail

crazymamma5

I loved the poem!!! As I read it I could hear the noises but knew the silence that came with the noise at the same time. I rarely hear the silence except maybe at night when I am getting ready to go to bed alone(because Jimmy is at work)....you know between the five kids and seven dogs...silence is hard to come by. From talking with you this morning and the medusa,lol, comments i would have never known you were so sad. If I would have known I would have asked you to go to town with us.
The medusa comments means that this morning we were discussing my hair and how i needed to find a helmet to go riding with my husband tomorrow. Well I have very curly,ummm,frizzy hair,especially during humid weather. and she IMed me that "Medusa rides again!!!!"
Anyhow loved the poem!!!: ohthedrama:

butchiesmom

When she talks about frizzy hair, she's not kidding, lol. The only other person I know who has hair frizzier than hers is my youngest daughter, lol.

You had plans I didn't want to insert myself into them. It was a down day. Don't feel bad about it. I talked to my mom on the phone this morning and she didn't catch on.

Anyway, I want to see you with the helmet on, lol. Have fun at Thunder in the Valley. I get to stay here and clip coupons. Woohoo. lol.

love ya,
Gail

SergoB