erikestabrook

We are all fractals
pieces of puzzles fragmented into one

the train moves faster
and I wonder why nothing can ever stay still?

blank stares are my novacaine on this east bound train

I imagine solving my puzzle by taking off every fractal
piece of my body

then i'll be the invisible man on top of the barely visible man.

SarahNSH

I really enjoyed reading this poem of yours and one of my favorite lines was this:

the train moves faster
and I wonder why nothing can ever stay still?


I've thought this many times myself and esepcially on something that is speeding forward that doesn't feel like it'll ever stop. I like how you worded the images/lines in your poem in creating great parts to read. Anywho, this was a thought provoking read and thank you for sharing it!

erikestabrook

thanks Sarah whats supposed to be the main verse is

blank stares are my novacaine on this east bound train

I appreciate your viewpoint

JeffMeyer

Erik:

While you are the writer and know your intent best, for this reader was by far the most powerful line of the poem. The persona seems to imply here that if his true id were invisible, see-through, clear, perhaps so would be the puzzle of life (or life's current puzzle) that he is trying to solve. Also, by implying that the man, as he is now, is only barely visibly intimates the anonymity of the city dweller (which the title and surrounding lines depict), and illustrates the frustration of one man trying to bring about reaching change, or even trying to figure out which change would be best to enact. The aloneness and insignificance are well shown here, as is the aformention frustration. Nice piece stated in just a few lines; that's a rare gift. Well done.

--Jeff Meyer

butchiesmom

I have to agree with Jeff, Erik. I, too, thought that line the most powerful, the most telling of the entire poem.

I also like the lines Sarah highlighted. The futility of wanting time to slow down a bit so I can catch up with it.

Great write, Erik!

Gail