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    JPiC Portal » Main Forum Index » Poetic Colours » The Critique Saloon » Revisions

Revisions All revised works initially posted in the Critique Saloon need to go in this section.

My Dream (Revised)11/06)
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Old 11-03-2006, 12:01 PM
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My Dream (Revised)11/06)

My Dream



I have a dream of passionate

play on one velvet day.


To be made love to,

entirely as a woman,

in a room full of candle-lit

glow upon a bed of red and

white rose petals.

Symbolizing unity.


As a sweet aroma

fills the air, a light

zephyr gently flows

through a slightly

open window.


"Unforgettable" plays

softly in the background,

intensifying our affection.


The mild breeze cools

our bodies in motion.


Gleaming walls reflect

silhouettes of love,

capturing intense

moments of burning desire!


Soft moans echo thru the hall.



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