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    JPiC Forum for Writers is an online community exclusively dedicated to the share of poetry and writing. As a continuing work-in-progress, our poetry forums host a melange of writing with new additions being posted daily. We encourage you to right now and come join us in our celebration of diversity with the typed word!


    Intricate soul intricate soul

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    She walked away slowly,
    Reminiscent of the way she kissed;
    Like the sun rising over the hills at dawn.
    Oh, but her eyes glistened like cats do in the light
    They looked at him wanting-
    and embarrassed at the same time.
    Then the darkness consumed her
    Eclipsing her like the moon does the sun
    and that you never experience
    Except every thousand years or so.
    Something that should be treasured,
    Not held close to the heart with contempt and jealousy.
    Still he wanted her for the passion in her heart
    That she had given to another,
    Who barely noticed her beauty anymore.
    Still he wanted her….



    Nicholas J. Sosa ©2007

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    PaintedDiary JPiC Mentor

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    Dear Intricate :giftrose:

    :wow: This piece totally captured me. I felt the magnetism, and longing. Those last four lines just radiated truth, and I know so many can relate. Many may experience this, and even accept that horrible feeling of "being unnoticed anymore", and remain in that state. As well as an "Intricate Soul" still wanting her, sill able to see the beauty in her, and still could make her believe that her beauty is her light. This was simply lovely, raw, and oh so delicate. LOVED IT!!!!! Thank you for sharing this. :bravo:

    {{{~~**PAINTED**~~}}};)2
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    MsJacquiiC Poetica Magnifique

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    Hey NICK - just from reading those 1st 2 lines: WHOA! You know the saying about people judging the book by the cover? I don't LOL --- Not that I'm picky about literature mind you - but I generally read the 1st couple of lines and then pick a middle passage... I dare say most well-thought-of novels are memorable by their 1st lines and not by their cover LOL

    But this poem has the most intricately woven 1st lines -- Really that sounds kinda cheesy to me ROFL - but seriously - from those 2 lines I just knew this is one to really enjoy. Kinda like an old Coltrane or Miles Davis piece - before they went "genious"

    Anyway - I rambling.... I like this poem though
    It's sweet. Definitely can see why you'd name it Desireable
    Nicely written - Thanx for the share!

    Jacquii.


    Posted By MsJacquiiC | Apr 3, 2007
    #3

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