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    Hello Guest | Welcome To Jacquii's Poetry in Color Forum


    JPiC Forum for Writers is an online community exclusively dedicated to the share of poetry and writing. As a continuing work-in-progress, our poetry forums host a melange of writing with new additions being posted daily. We encourage you to right now and come join us in our celebration of diversity with the typed word!


    LW Barker New Member

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    Oh what is it that I long so bad;
    What is it that keeps me awake at night?
    Could it be you my Distant Moon?

    But, no- how could it be?
    For you are so far and fair, and not even - human!

    But yes, I know it's you,
    for you have always been there.
    For through my windows your light shines bright;
    In dark and lonely night, you light my way.

    I just want to taste you just once;
    To feel your heavenly embrace round about my waist.

    Give me comfort, and keep me safe;
    For it IS you that I want -
    my Distant Moon.


    Posted By LW Barker | Jul 14, 2006
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  1. Lurking

    MsJacquiiC Poetica Magnifique

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    Hi LW - This poem is sweet. A beckoning to love... I liked reading this piece, as it's has an inspirational quality of sorts. It's like you telling someone who may be "shy" about approaching a potential lover: "Hey if I can do it - so can you - Don't be shy - go get your love, lover!"

    I also like how you give "Distant Moon" a human quality. You've made the moon to be more of an intimate that one may approach, as opposed to being just a far-away object that's impossible to reach.

    All-in-all a very nice poem - I enjoyed reading this one!
    Thanx for sharing it!

    Jacquii.


    Posted By MsJacquiiC | Jul 15, 2006
    #2

    LW Barker New Member

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    Hi Jaquii, I'm happy that your enjoyed distant moon. Many more to come ;)

    LW


    Posted By LW Barker | Jul 15, 2006
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    PaintedDiary JPiC Mentor

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    Hello L.W.,
    Once again, you have amazed with your poetic palette. I LOVE THIS!!!! I loved how you lead the reader to believe that just maybe, the Moon COULD be human, or tangible. I am sure we all have gazed at the Moon at one time or another. Some children even talk to the Moon. When I teach Astronomy, I make sure that my students know that the Moon is so much more than a big burned up chunck of rock! This poem just brings out the kid in me, and reinforces for me, why I love the Moon and the Moonlight. Beautiful piece my dear poet!

    drofdar New Member

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    Very well written....kept short and simple, yet told a story. The moon is a very enchanting being in this universe...and depending on what religion you are practicing it could be a tangible being. In celtic it would be known as Luna, the moon sprite. I have gazed many a time at the moon as I am a person of the night. I do everything I can at night. It mystifies me, embraces me, comforts me, enchants me, gives me a place to belong and I absolutely love. Very nice job, and keep it up! <(^v^)>


    Posted By drofdar | Dec 7, 2007
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    zaac Banned

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    this is quite refreshing and bold in it's honesty. only thing i saw was maybe changing the first word of the piece from what to why. nice job.

    zaac


    Posted By zaac | Dec 8, 2007
    #6

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