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Discussion in 'Spoken Word & Freestyle' started by zaac, Nov 18, 2011.

    zaac Banned

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    My dearest child Hannah Jane,

    When you were born, after they had made sure you were as perfect and healthy as I had always trusted my Father you would be, I was the first human outside of the doctors and nurses to ever touch you. I was the first to look into your eyes and from that moment I have forever been falling in love with you. I still have the picture when we got you home after your first bath. That's how you got the name punkin butt...I know, I know, I"m embarrassing you.

    I have watched you grow and blossom. I remember when you were in the hospital right before Christmas. You were so tiny and I was so terrified...you were only four months old. But God was faithful and your first Christmas is etched in my mind forever.

    There has been pain and heartache and fear in your young life already. I hope you know by now that life is not kind. It's why I teach you kindness. The world has so much hate. It's why I teach you love and tolerance. I see the fear in your eyes when you are put in positions no child should be put in. It's why I tell you all the time I am with you. It's why I teach you that a father's love can never come undone.

    I remember your first crush on a blonde headed boy in kindergarten. And not so long ago I had to stop calling you punkin butt because I didn't want to embarrass you in front of any boys. That was the moment my heart began to hurt, because I knew the day was coming when you would stand on your own. So as to not make you blush, I changed your nickname to Bubbles...because laughter bubbles out of you like pure water from a mountain spring...it just keeps coming. And you overflow my heart with the purity of all that is you.

    Tomorrow, you will walk with me down the aisle and you will put my hand in the hand of another girl. Don't worry love...she is not here to replace you. Nothing can do that. Don't be afraid, you will never be put aside as less important. Because you are the reason that I live. And it won't be long until I will be walking you down the aisle. And I will be putting your hand in the hand of another man. Know that mine will be trembling. And you will have to say these same things to me, as though you could stop my tears.

    There has never been a moment I wasn't proud of you nor will there ever be. It doesn't matter what you choose to do in life. The brightest lights and all the fame couldn't make you any more or less my child...and yes, love, you are your fathers child. And even if life is not kind and you find yourself in a place or position you would not like me to see you in, never be afraid. Being there for you is what I was created to do. I will not judge you. My job is to love you and help you grow.

    I hope you can forgive me for the times I was less than I should have been. Sometimes even Daddy's don't know what to do. Thank you for loving me in spite of my shortcomings. They don't have a daddy school you know, though I wish to God they did.

    Know there is nothing you can ever do to make me stop loving you...nothing. You will make decisions in your life that might not be the best. You are not alone. It's why you will find me standing beside you all the way.

    Tomorrow I will see you in your bridesmaid dress, 10 years old, caught between a giggling freckle-faced imp and a lady. How beautiful you are! You have your mother's eyes you know, and they are glistening like sunlight swimming in the morning dew. And you have my smile and a heart big as Texas. How tender it is...how precious to me.

    Hold my hand baby...I am nervous. I so want to get it right this time...God, please help me get it right this time. Know that I bring you into a family that could fill three churches packed full of love for you and they have never met you...what a gift that is!

    Know that I am happy. I hope you have watched me live...watched me fall down and get up again. You know that's the difference between success and failure; as long as you get up one more time than you fall down.

    And when I grow old, please be patient with me. I will be frail and maybe even confused. Please remember then, the nights I chased the monsters away...the day I fooled you into thinking I was holding onto your bicycle seat and you rode all by yourself for two whole blocks. All your life, know that my hand will always be there, and the Hand of our Father covers us.

    Of all the things I have accomplished in my life; of all the things I am most proud of, the best moment of my life was when you told me You invited the Jesus I love into your heart. Nothing tops that. Walk with Him; tell Him everything...He really loves you, you know...and that's not just a made up story.

    Always stand tall and proud little lady. You were made by the Creator of all that is and made perfectly in love. And never let anyone steal your peace, your joy, or your dreams. They are a gift from the hand of God Himself and are to be guarded closely, just as you are to guard your heart and mind by knowing His Word.

    When God gave me you, I gave you back to Him out of gratitude, because I was old enough at the time that I never thought I'd ever have a child, especially one like you. So I put you in His hands to keep you safe, just as my father did for me. The years were hard and the lessons harder, but this one truth you must never forget. He is always faithful...forever faithful.

    You are my miracle. I hope I have not hurt your heart. No matter what anyone says; no matter what they do; no matter how impossible things seem as they sometimes do, know that my love covers you and our Fathers love covers us all.

    I am sorry I cannot be there for you to tuck in you in every night. I hope that will change. I might finally get some sleep knowing my baby is under my roof. And I so want to show you the wonders of this world, just like my mom and dad did for me.

    As hard as it is, it is a lesson. I will not always be able to be there to protect you or guide you. When the time comes for you to make your own path, make it your own and no one elses. It is yours alone. And know that even if I can't be there at times, or when the day comes my Father calls me home, know my love is there with you always. And I will watch over you until He tells me it's time to come and get you. And I promise I will come running as fast as I can.

    I dream of the day when we stand before His Throne. There will be no prouder moment in my life than when I hear my Father say to you, the child of my heart, "well, done, my daughter, well done."

    Bubbles and Palominos...I love you forever,


    Posted By zaac | Nov 18, 2011

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