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    Hello Guest | Welcome To Jacquii's Poetry in Color Forum


    JPiC Forum for Writers is an online community exclusively dedicated to the share of poetry and writing. As a continuing work-in-progress, our poetry forums host a melange of writing with new additions being posted daily. We encourage you to right now and come join us in our celebration of diversity with the typed word!


    v3sista U Know Me

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    You planted a seed, I grew. Now I want to be free of you.
    Our lives back then, they weren't so sweet, the guys, drugs; no food to eat.
    I was scared. Just wanted to be held, but you were never there.
    I'd close my eyes and hope to be far away from this dark place.
    Yet each time I woke-was still here. Has God forgotten bout me?
    Naw, I must have a purpose; what lies ahead out there for me?
    I am not here to suffer, I am good, like Strawberry fruit.
    I must go now, this seed has grown, this- No longer is my home.
    I'm steppin out, trying something new and fresh, like Chocolate.


    Posted By v3sista | Feb 2, 2007
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    MsJacquiiC Poetica Magnifique

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    Hey V - I'm loving this poem - you've done well with the challenge words, but it's not quite a CinqTroisDecaLa Rhyme... The rhyme schematic for the style is aabbccabc - The syllable count of your lines (15) is correct though...

    Anyway - back on topic :p ---- This piece is quite sweet - I'm loving the confidence - especially the very last line:

    Allright - I hear ya - You go Girl ;)
    Very nice piece of poetry!

    Jacquii.


    Posted By MsJacquiiC | Feb 2, 2007
    #2

    erikestabrook JPiC Premium VIP Member

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    I still find it weird when the words naw appear in apoem but this poem was super-original

    lanaia74 New Member

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    You are very talented! Superb wor here!:wave: :jump: :monkeydance2:


    Posted By lanaia74 | Feb 2, 2007
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    v3sista U Know Me

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    TY Ms J - I missed that part I guess, it was a challenge all the same, you see I used all but one of the words from the list.
    Erik TY 4 your comments, U know poetry is about being able to use anything and make it work for you. :)
    Lanaia- Ty, you are very kind. Ms J puts some hard stuff out there, try them sometime. They turn out to be quite fun though- I must admit.....

    V3


    Posted By v3sista | Feb 3, 2007
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    MsJacquiiC Poetica Magnifique

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    Hey MS V - I see :p
    Anyway - nice poem none-the-less
    I also went ahead and put the posts in the Creativity Challenge itself: http://jpicforum.info/creativity-ou...y-6-cinqtroisdecala-rhyme-challenge-2010.html

    Thanx for posting and sharing the poem with us ;)

    Jacquii.


    Posted By MsJacquiiC | Feb 4, 2007
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    Altree94 VIP Member

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    Good Job, V! Even though the rhyme scheme thing is off, you still did way better than I did with the challenge words! That was a difficult one, but it really was fun. Love to see what you can do with the next one!

    :welldone:


    Posted By Altree94 | Feb 8, 2007
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    dazamaru Member

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    i dont know what a CinqDela...ahh.....really is,
    but it was a engaging write...

    I love the final line.....it speaks of hope and adventure...

    great write.


    Posted By dazamaru | Feb 8, 2007
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    MsJacquiiC Poetica Magnifique

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    Posted By MsJacquiiC | Feb 8, 2007
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    Jeez Banned

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    :goodjob: :goodpost: :thanx2:


    Posted By Jeez | Feb 10, 2007
    #10

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