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Discussion in 'Emotional Romantic' started by Ha Hoang, Apr 10, 2011.



    Ha Hoang New Member

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    HUMAN BIRTH


    Reverse eye Looked at sky asking why
    Galaxies width know is bao
    People like small grains of sand
    Water wave float go again accretion


    Posted By Ha Hoang | Apr 10, 2011
    #1

  1. Cool

    nomadicrhymer JPiC Premium VIP Member

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    Ha, I liked this piece very much. I can't decide whether it is all related or should be taken apart, as each separate line speaks to me differently. It does allow one to question what part of human birth you are focusing on, if it is only one aspect. It brings to mind the birth of an idea, the birth of a project, new beginnings... especially the last line relating to the increasing sizes of the waves. I have to say when I read line two I immediately thought of Chao su bao? Not sure if I spelled that right, but I love them. :)

    Great job!
    Nomad :beach:
  2. Lurking

    MsJacquiiC Poetica Magnifique

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    Seems like something got lost in translation. I'm not sure what this means. Anyway - interesting piece - literally describes human birth, though I'm not sure about "people like small grains of sand" -- using this logic - if it gets hot enough, the sand will turn to glass. Humanity is not so transparent in my opinion.

    At anyrate - Please familiarize yourself with the JPiC Posting Policy before posting any more of your poetry Ha. You have other threads you've posted that have comments. Feel free to acknowledge those who've commented your threads!

    Jacquii.


    Posted By MsJacquiiC | Apr 11, 2011
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    jakeminick McGonagall's Ghost

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    pretty cool. got the whole galaxy ocean thing going. i get interesting visuals from it. i looked up "bao" and thought maybe you were referring to the game where pebbles go down holes. like black holes i would suspect. if so, that seems like a pretty great metaphor in
    . stimulates my imagination. i would like to see more of this kind.


    Posted By jakeminick | Apr 13, 2011
    #4

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