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    Hello Guest | Welcome To Jacquii's Poetry in Color Forum


    JPiC Forum for Writers is an online community exclusively dedicated to the share of poetry and writing. As a continuing work-in-progress, our poetry forums host a melange of writing with new additions being posted daily. We encourage you to right now and come join us in our celebration of diversity with the typed word!


  1. Confused

    Wind WindXSaul

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    I Can’t Forget You


    No matter how hard I try your right there with the smile that
    could kill any person with only a simply glance.I wanted to say
    sorry yet the words never quite came when I saw you more
    like I wanted to hide my guilt with sad jokes and games the
    more I struggled the more you tried to come close yet I decided
    to depart so I could know your beautiful face would stay until I
    started crying over the mistake I had made and wanted you back
    in my life. Though I have no regrets I do reflect on everything and
    wonder what I could have done to change it don’t let me go yet I
    will struggle cause it hurts to feel this feelings that I have I want
    to crush them for them seem unnatural though they come so sweetly.
    I can’t forget you so don’t forget me so that we may meet again
    and see each other with that feeling in heart.


    Posted By Wind | Feb 16, 2012
    #1

  2. Depressed

    butchiesmom JPiC Premium VIP Member

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    Gotta go to bed but will be replying tomorrow!
    Gail
  3. Depressed

    butchiesmom JPiC Premium VIP Member

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    Such an emotional write! Was this a romance broken by mistakes or by death? You're reflectly on what might been given the opportunity for change. Would you let me know if I've interpreted this correctly?

    Because it was harder to read the way you posted it I've suggested a few formating changes, corrected spelling mistakes and some punctuation without (I hope) changing the passion radiating from your work. Please disregard any suggestions I've made if you don't agree. I probably missed a few punctuation places (not my forte...) I'm sure there's other people who can help.

    Good write Wind!
    Gail
  4. Confused

    Wind WindXSaul

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    i thank you so very much


    Posted By Wind | Mar 8, 2012
    #4
  5. Lurking

    MsJacquiiC Poetica Magnifique

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    Thanks for posting the spelling/grammar corrections Gail! And I hope you take note Wind :p
    I've just read this poem and the first thought that came to mind is ==> WHOA! Such an incredible, emotional insight into the romantic realm for such a young person. Reminds me of someone I love; he was likely too young for me, yet so wise and learned beyond his years.

    Anyway - thanks for the share.

    J.


    Posted By MsJacquiiC | Mar 25, 2012
    #5
  6. Confused

    Wind WindXSaul

    Member Since:
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    thank you i'm still gettign used to it but thank you


    Posted By Wind | Mar 25, 2012
    #6

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