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    Hello Guest | Welcome To Jacquii's Poetry in Color Forum


    JPiC Forum for Writers is an online community exclusively dedicated to the share of poetry and writing. As a continuing work-in-progress, our poetry forums host a melange of writing with new additions being posted daily. We encourage you to right now and come join us in our celebration of diversity with the typed word!


    Benny New Member

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    Lunch bucket sits dusty-
    in exile after greed
    drowned common sense
    when the plant closed-
    contents unchanged within
    but not forgotten by its owner.

    Remembering clearly-
    7:30am found them mute
    standing before the entry
    to what gave each existence-
    the empty faces of disbelief
    that would pass to a wife.

    Halloween came early-
    no treat to be sought out
    in the trick served them
    that cold October morn-
    Christmas brought few gifts
    for his twenty year devotion.

    In that dusty lunch box-
    held proudly everyday
    in hands by which pride
    honestly believed-
    lay one peanut butter sandwich
    under a note that read, 'I love you!'.


    Posted By Benny | Oct 31, 2006
    #1

    Altree94 VIP Member

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    This was Awesome! This is one that I can really relate to!

    I do put notes in my husband's lunch box and the guys he works with have told me that when he doesn't get one, he's a bear to work with!

    TY!


    Posted By Altree94 | Oct 31, 2006
    #2
  1. Lurking

    MsJacquiiC Poetica Magnifique

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    This was SCARY - any poem with the words "Halloween" AND "Christmas" within such proximety (sp?) of each other inspires a dread not known to many in this wonderland we like to call "Down South"

    Excellent use of "trick" though :)

    Thanx for sharing!

    Jacquii.


    Posted By MsJacquiiC | Oct 31, 2006
    #3

    lanaia74 New Member

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    Briliant! Superb! Bravo!:welldone: :gossip: :clown:


    Posted By lanaia74 | Jan 3, 2007
    #4

    JolieH JPiC Contributor

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    The sandwhich was old, but the note was fresh as the day it was wrote - and the sentiment to go with it.
    Very nice Benny.


    Posted By JolieH | Nov 1, 2007
    #5

    feralpen New Member

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    'Lunch Bucket' is written with the insight, inspiration and understanding only felt by one who has been there. I was able to read in the same context. I've saw that look on my wifes face in 1981. Two small children added to the urgency of a holiday season coming... and absolutely no prospects. Your poem is well written and expresses somber emotions that lay with despair.

    fp


    Posted By feralpen | Nov 3, 2007
    #6

    Aumakua Misunderstood

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    Wow, i've never read a poem that had both Christmas and Halloween in it :O

    I don't think i quite get this poem though *dammit!* T^T


    Posted By Aumakua | Nov 6, 2007
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    zaac Banned

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    if you aint the sweetest thing. lol this is good stuff. I love stuff that gives inanimate objects a heart and life of their own with their own story to tell. i miss you my friend, i really do.

    zaac


    Posted By zaac | Nov 6, 2007
    #8

    Curtis Spider Lee Curtis Spider Lee

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    Benny this is "Lovining Creative" poem! I almost missed this one, but I'm glade I did'nt because I would definitely be hungry! Well done Sir!
  2. Artistic

    Mysty JPiC Premium VIP Member

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    Ohh Benny.... I fear such a circumstance ever happening .. I am sorry if you had to go through it and I am sorry Feralpen did too. I work too.. so things would not be as bad... but omg.... my stomach sinks with that sick feeling....

    My husband walked off of his job ... and was out of work for 6 months before he even began to look for another job. And we have 2 children...

    They are adults now, my kids but ... I was working ....minimum wage....nightstocking at walmart. Those were hard times.

    Benny you always write with precision and understanding..... you bring understanding to the masses.. and those who don't understand..... well god forbid that they should ever have to go through it. Thank you for an Excellent write..... it is going in my favorites.

    Luv ya

    Mysty


    Posted By Mysty | Feb 17, 2008
    #10

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