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Discussion in 'Spoken Word & Freestyle' started by Wind, Sep 29, 2012.



  1. Confused

    Wind WindXSaul

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    Let me breathe
    Let me see
    Let me hear
    For I will captivate you
    And you will fall

    I will steal you
    I will watch you bleed
    I will see your tears
    But you smile,why?
    For I have stolen you?

    Watch and fall
    Watch and smile
    Watch and let me keep you
    I,with my sword and shield I rise with the sun and set with the moon
    Watching I shall pierce you

    Let me breathe
    I will steal yo
    Watch and fall
    Do you see me?
    Now watch as I keep your heart and your mind


    Posted By Wind | Sep 29, 2012
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  2. Lurking

    MsJacquiiC Poetica Magnifique

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    Wow. Scary piece.

    Interesting... As a lover of the smile - I would say, "Because I can smile and would like to share the world with you. But why would you have stolen me, whilst I cannot see, for the tears have blinded mine eyes?"

    Anyway - interesting write. Who is Marcquoise?


    Posted By MsJacquiiC | Sep 30, 2012
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  3. Confused

    Wind WindXSaul

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    Saul had thought of the name so i just went along with it


    Posted By Wind | Oct 1, 2012
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  4. Artistic

    Mysty JPiC Premium VIP Member

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    Very interesting Read..... I wonder lol this almost sounds like a promise from a stalker. Very eerie .... Good penning Wind.


    Posted By Mysty | Oct 6, 2012
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  5. Confused

    Wind WindXSaul

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    It was a promise to a stalker.....the only one i would promise
    • Love Love x 1


    Posted By Wind | Oct 6, 2012
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    MsJacquiiC Poetica Magnifique

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    LOL - I was thinking the same thing. Of course I'd get all haughty and naughty with the stalker LOL

    You've got it - You've got it bad!!


    Posted By MsJacquiiC | Oct 6, 2012
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  7. Confused

    Wind WindXSaul

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    I was...


    Posted By Wind | Oct 7, 2012
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  8. Magical

    Morning Star Member

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    Wonderful poem Wind, just exceptional

    I especially loved
    " I rise with the sun and set with the moon"

    Truly wonderful poem and very well written.
  9. Confused

    Wind WindXSaul

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    Thank you,to think truthfully i was half asleep when i wrote this.....and i drew some things to go with the words...but i don't know why or when it was written...like i said i was half asleep


    Posted By Wind | Oct 11, 2012
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  10. Magical

    Morning Star Member

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    Well half asleep or not, it was very good.
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    Wind WindXSaul

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    Thank you very much


    Posted By Wind | Oct 12, 2012
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  12. Depressed

    butchiesmom JPiC Premium VIP Member

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    I loved this as well. The above quote, I heard it often when referred to someone obsessed with another person and love that you used it to describe a stalker.
    Kudos to your writing this half-asleep. I don't think I'd be able to do this well wide-awake, lol.
    Great write, Wind.
    Gail
  13. Confused

    Wind WindXSaul

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    Thank you very much,and o-o i did have a stalker but it fine since i don't have him anymore he was really nice to.

    And doing it half asleep was sort of a surprise to myself as well


    Posted By Wind | Oct 15, 2012
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  14. Artistic

    Mysty JPiC Premium VIP Member

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    lol Sometimes I go into a trance when I write Wind... so do not be surprised ... be thankful your subconscious knew it had something to get out. :)


    Posted By Mysty | Oct 16, 2012
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  15. Confused

    Wind WindXSaul

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    I suppose using me have asleep trying to express what i refuse to say,don't ever action we take do that already? if that didn't then what are we doing playing everything piece by piece until we break? if that the case then how is it nothing ever for told with out movements?...what could are sleeping mind teach us that are awake mine can't understand


    Posted By Wind | Oct 16, 2012
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  16. Artistic

    Mysty JPiC Premium VIP Member

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    Too much I am afraid. We have power to attain the unattainable. Look at all the civilizations that disappeared. They attained what was possible. Apparently our ancestors saw more of the Outer space aliens than we do now. Why is that?? Because we are more violent today? And though we hear it often ....who uses the Love thine neighbor as though wouldst have thine neighbor love thee. Or how about how love is Universal? But who uses that ???


    Posted By Mysty | Oct 17, 2012
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  17. Confused

    Wind WindXSaul

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    Violence has been seen as love but it more of a controlling tool as well to hold on you use lies to keep uncertain retained use violence.

    Loving one nieghbour was once a realitistic thing and now it something sad to keep a child to learn to behave.If we can love ourselves the ones around us and certainly we can love what's ever out there


    Posted By Wind | Oct 17, 2012
    #17

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