Welcome to JPiC Forum For Writers! Please log in or sign up to interact with our Community.
  1. Welcome!

    Hello Guest | Welcome To Jacquii's Poetry in Color Forum


    JPiC Forum for Writers is an online community exclusively dedicated to the share of poetry and writing. As a continuing work-in-progress, our poetry forums host a melange of writing with new additions being posted daily. We encourage you to right now and come join us in our celebration of diversity with the typed word!


  1. Confused

    Wind WindXSaul

    Member Since:
    Feb 8, 2012
    Message Count:
    188
    Trophy Points:
    18
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Dallas
    Books:
    0
    Ratings Received:
    +22 / 0 / -5

    The Angel I Knew


    Skin so fair like snow as no comparison
    With hair so wild and eyes which shows,
    somewhat sad and yet fear-ish glow.
    How long do you plan to keep me
    by your side?
    Under you spell by sound of voice,I fall
    to my knees for you.Batter,broken and scared
    Yet even betrayed I'll stay by your side loyal
    and proud foremost happy. As I stand by your
    Side I look into your eyes.
    The turning leaves rain upon your head.
    The worse be I captivated by you.With your
    Snowy white skin
    Wild hair and twilighted eyes
    You spread your angelica wings,you took off leaving me
    But with beautiful memories,So that I never forget
    Well see each other again.
    But for now
    Your The Angel I once Knew
    • Like Like x 1


    Posted By Wind | Oct 12, 2012
    #1

    erikestabrook JPiC Premium VIP Member

    Member Since:
    Aug 6, 2006
    Message Count:
    1,711
    Trophy Points:
    53
    Home page:
    Books:
    0
    Ratings Received:
    +15 / 0 / -0
    how nice to see the description of an angel written down, my only point of dislike is that there are allot of grammar errors,
    I used to have this problem as well, it does take away from the message, the best thing you can do is refine sentences you already know as proper grammer and then maybe use a word or two different, then look up the proper spelling and punctuation/usage, this will not only expand your vocabulary but get you used to using new words in poetry, I enjoyed your poem, keep writing
  2. Confused

    Wind WindXSaul

    Member Since:
    Feb 8, 2012
    Message Count:
    188
    Trophy Points:
    18
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Dallas
    Books:
    0
    Ratings Received:
    +22 / 0 / -5
    Oh yes i know of all of the grammar errors.but since i wrote this for a friend who not very well with poetry and it was a birthday present i made sure to use them short and simple...


    Posted By Wind | Oct 12, 2012
    #3
  3. Spaced

    LE00EL New Member

    Member Since:
    Oct 23, 2012
    Message Count:
    21
    Trophy Points:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Books:
    0
    Ratings Received:
    +8 / 0 / -0
    Beautiful artwork my sisstar, with an eloquent message attached.[IMG]


    Posted By LE00EL | Oct 24, 2012
    #4
  4. Confused

    Wind WindXSaul

    Member Since:
    Feb 8, 2012
    Message Count:
    188
    Trophy Points:
    18
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Dallas
    Books:
    0
    Ratings Received:
    +22 / 0 / -5
    Thank you very much


    Posted By Wind | Oct 24, 2012
    #5

    generation.boom New Member

    Member Since:
    May 21, 2013
    Message Count:
    20
    Trophy Points:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Books:
    0
    Ratings Received:
    +3 / 0 / -2
    That's really a very good poetry said for some beautiful person.........
    What will you feel if i used this to impress my girlfriend , i think she will be get excited after listen it.
  5. Confused

    Wind WindXSaul

    Member Since:
    Feb 8, 2012
    Message Count:
    188
    Trophy Points:
    18
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Dallas
    Books:
    0
    Ratings Received:
    +22 / 0 / -5
    Well please do so. And I hope she loves it.


    Posted By Wind | May 28, 2013
    #7

We hope you're enjoying our forum!

Only registered Members have access to posting priviledges. Registration here is 100% FREE. Use the button below to begin registration or the form on the right to login to your account.

Forgot your password?

Share This Page