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    Hello Guest | Welcome To Jacquii's Poetry in Color Forum


    JPiC Forum for Writers is an online community exclusively dedicated to the share of poetry and writing. As a continuing work-in-progress, our poetry forums host a melange of writing with new additions being posted daily. We encourage you to right now and come join us in our celebration of diversity with the typed word!


    leaddoginteriors CON-FUSALED

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    Their huddled masses form everywhere, any empty spaces or beneith the stairs, reclessly discarded as if no one cares, the community i call shoes
    Every color, size and shape, some like new some repaired with tape, what an awefull mess they make, the community i call shoes
    The brown, the black the red and white, some too big and some too tight, stumbled on inthe night, the community i call shoes
    We pass them by as we scurry about, offer no helping hand to pull them out, in Gods eyes a sin no doubt, the community i call shoes
    They're walked upon, and payed no heed, laughed at and scorned as we watch them bleed, left alone like a banished breed, the community i call shoes
    Mental wards, prisons and parks are where our shoes are stored, all once treasured items, but now they are ignored
    So no one cares where they go, or what becomes of them, keep them hiden out of sight and get some more again,
    our community i call shoes

    JolieH JPiC Contributor

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    Hey Cal,
    This is a very good, a great metaphor that express need and internal suffering. Wonderful use of images, and loaded with symbols that play a magnificent tune. I think we all can relate to this in one way or another. Those shoes may be worn, but they still shine. Just cover the scratches with a good polish, kick the shit out of the road, and keep on dancing.


    Posted By JolieH | Sep 23, 2007
    #2

    Aste Intellectual Teen

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    [IMG]

    Wow, I'm Impressed. I enjoyed the sort of under lying Cadence that plays underneath the wording of your poem. I doubt it is intentional, but Yah know.

    :] :wub:

    [IMG]


    Posted By Aste | Sep 23, 2007
    #3

    Benny New Member

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    Great work! Lots of life lesson found in this one...hey, I'm a shoe!


    Posted By Benny | Sep 24, 2007
    #4
  1. Cool

    nomadicrhymer JPiC Premium VIP Member

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    Very nice, lead...and VERY original! Great write!

    Nomad

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