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    Hello Guest | Welcome To Jacquii's Poetry in Color Forum


    JPiC Forum for Writers is an online community exclusively dedicated to the share of poetry and writing. As a continuing work-in-progress, our poetry forums host a melange of writing with new additions being posted daily. We encourage you to right now and come join us in our celebration of diversity with the typed word!


    jakeminick McGonagall's Ghost

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    Without direction,
    Neurosis spins around the vessel.
    Best to wind a path for will to push
    Or, the flush consumes the wreckage.
    Tactics of sidewinder,
    With blind vision through the blackness.
    Bemused by the taboo
    Of feeling through the madness.
    Bat-eyed flight,
    Slithering through the night.
    This dark elixir is abused with ease,
    Enticing into plight.
    Clawing through the swamp,
    A black lung full of habits.
    Impulsively encircling that which equals
    Seething scribbles on a tablet.
    A dragon sniffs confusion;
    Lounging at the summit.
    Exhaling veils of smoke to hide
    The places where he plummets.
    She’s a culture grown sadist,
    He devours the mutations.
    Hording all the treasured selves
    We can cram into our faces.
    A game of identification;
    It’s King Koopa and an Asian;
    The software and technician;
    The complacence and the bitching.


    Posted By jakeminick | Feb 17, 2011
    #1

    Azekiel-Horizon New Member

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    Out of all the pieces I read from you today this one was my favorite. You really drop a gem with this one, the words you put together in this piece was great. It had a great flow to it. The whole piece was great all around but this part stood out the most to me
    You really drop some gems today my fellow poet continue t drop more poetic masterpieces like this
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    MsJacquiiC Poetica Magnifique

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    A poem inspired by Super Mario Brothers? Lovely concept, but surely this one is deeper than commentary on one of my most favorite video games of all time. This seems to be a commentary on the sad affairs of life, when one is down in the dumps, possibly sitting next to the dope man or some tweaked out coke head, or possibly inside the meth house...

    Anyway - wow - This made for an intriguing write. Such abstract way of putting things.

    Nice stuff here. Very nice. Care to comment on your inspirations for this one Jake? Also - the title... I'm not sure I'm making the connection LOL

    Thanks for the share whatever the case may be :)

    Jacquii.


    Posted By MsJacquiiC | Mar 13, 2011
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    jakeminick McGonagall's Ghost

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    the poem was inspired by "tommorow morning" by aesop rock although, only in rhythm really. i kind of ripped his style a little so i had to note that. it's about exploring different philosophies; ideologies, then going deeper into things like the occult and such, until you go too far and become kind of maddened and aimless. it's about trying to overcome "the dragon" that developed you. hense, the jungian references of dragon and summit and the swamp is like the forest.

    "it's a game of identification"... i've been reading "Science and Sanity" lately so i had to throw something about identifications in there. identifications and relations seeming to be the "dirt" of existence, underlying symbols and everything.
    "it's king koopa and an asian" is just my catchy way of saying that we create our own dragons as well. like we're our own programmers. plus it's an ode to the game because i've been thinking about all the references in the game and, in my far fetched imagination i could see them making this game as way to get kids to step out of fixed reality by processing information on another plane. i tacked the title on there to show that one is "the player" and the programmer...and the princess and the dragon and, a plumber with a sweet mustache who likes to eat mushrooms and defeat dragons. i could go on for way too long but, this is my long-winded and, still half-assed comment on the inspirations surrounding this.


    Posted By jakeminick | Mar 19, 2011
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    MsJacquiiC Poetica Magnifique

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    Intriguing!
    And yeah - I always thought of Super Mario Brothers in a deeper context as opposed to some silly guys going around killing dragons and eating mushrooms. Speaking of which - I wouldn't mind at all have a few shrooms for meself. But I digress lol.



    Anyway - I really REALLY enjoyed this poem. I wasn't familiar with Aesop Rock so I googled. I can totally see from whence your inspiration comes. And after checking out this joint, your poem is mystically on-point, the abstract meshing to become a surreal commentary.

    I don't know about ripping the style though - it seems you've made this style your own! Good inspirations there :)


    Posted By MsJacquiiC | Mar 20, 2011
    #5

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